Third Anniversary – Friendship

“Friendship, like the immortality of the soul, is too good to be believed. When friendships are real, they are not glass threads or frost work, but the solidest things we know.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

A couple of days ago the third anniversary of Être ou Avoir came and left without any fanfare, let alone any postings. This does not mean however that I forgot that it has been three years since we went live at irober.wordpress.com. Rather, I knew I would get around to posting, and instead have been enjoying some time tieing up some loose ends, and then taking some time with friends, rather than jump on to my computer.

Now that I’m hear and reflect briefly on the past year of both blogging, and the past year in general, I find that friendship has been more prevalent in my thoughts and in my postings. This is certainly not to say that I have all of a sudden seen value in friends. Far from it in fact. For years now I have put a high value on the relationship with my friends (including my family). Regardless of time and space, the relationships I attempt to build with close friends involve trust, care, patience, intentionality and love. While some might see these as being the qualities of a partner relationship, it became clear a few years ago that nothing less should be expected from a close friendship. Values, hopes, challenges, and balance – perhaps the defining characteristics of us all – can all be defined, supported, and achieved with friends of this nature.

The values, hopes, challenges and balance woven into this past year have meant a little less blogging from me. However, they have also resulted in a deepening of my close friendships. Quite frankly, I would not have wanted it any other way. At the outset of this blog I made clear that it is important to be off engaged in other things, especially adventure, instead of typing on a computer. In this past year I feel I have. Further, friends have garnered a great deal more influence in this space on the internet in the past year, with suggestions, feedback, questions, sharing, and conversations. Quite frankly, what would I do without them?

In relation to the theme: I have always tended to lean towards the side of being a friend, rather than having friend. Yet, with personal milestones this past year, overcoming challenges, and the deepening of friendships in all areas of my life – work, play, family, social – I see value in both the being and the having. That being said, the act of being, or existing in friendship, is still one of the finest things in life.

Rather than continue to babble on, about either a third year of blogging finished, or friendship, perhaps a couple of quotes that balance each other off would be more appropriate.

The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention… A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words. – Rachel Naomi Remen

A friend is one before whom I may think aloud. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

As you know, I’m a fan of saying what you mean yourself, but I still get roped into a quote every now and then. I do not fret about this. It will likely continue to happen in the fourth year of this blog. C’est la vie. I look forward to the adventures, and postings of the next year. More than those, I look forward to the continued, and perhaps even new, friendships of the next year, and look back with wonderment, and gratitude.

Thank you. A bientôt.

The most I can do for my friend is simply to be his friend. I have no wealth to bestow on him. If he knows that I am happy in loving him, he will want no other reward. Is not friendship divine in this? - Henery David Thoreau

Summer Requests

Welcome to summer!

With it’s official arrival yesterday, the season that is often a fan favourite has gotten off to a decent start. June could rank as my favourite month. You have sneaky long days that many don’t notice (except perhaps myself and S.), along with general feelings of positive expectaions and exciting anticipation for the glamorous summer months of July and August.

Currently, and locally, the weather has been decent, there are a number of community events on the calendar, and personally I have some more free time for a bit. This coincides nicely with the long days, and the third anniversary of Être ou Avoir. Thus, if there is a topic you would like to see a post on, please let me know. Maybe you’re even interested in giving blogging a go, and we could have some guest posts? Whether it is revisiting an old topic, striking up a new one, or just posing a question, I’m always open to requests, but a little more so around the time of the anniversary. Plus, be sure to keep track of any memorable, funny, ironic, silly, or even philosophical quotes that arise during your summer experiences. A post last year that colleted quotes of the summer seemed to go over well, so we might try again this season.

Finally, and mainly, wishing you an excellent start to the summer. I hope you get to spend lots of time outside and adventuring.

Argh

Apparently I haven’t written here in a while, almost a month to be exact. Further, the previous two posts are short in nature (although the March 1^st one was very meaningful). Where have I been? Nowhere special – except, maybe I have been.

This post was supposed to be about something. It was supposed to be about one of the two outstanding books I finished reading – one of them some time ago – when I wasn’t blogging. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, along with Three Day Road were excellent and exceptional respectively. They deserve postings, but, as it turns out, not this one. Then, it was supposed to be about Heimspeil, the documentary I told you I would write more about – and I should, just not now. I then considered a recent physical challenge I took on might be deemed blog worthy. While it may very well be, it didn’t transform into a post today. Some might suggest that my thoughts have been centred around a milestone recently – at least society deems it a milestone, to be honest I didn’t feel different, but it did give an excuse – and I looked back at the past 5, 10, and 15 years in some brief thoughts.

It was at this point when I began to get into what this post was really about – mainly that it was not meant to be “about” any “thing” in particular. Rather, I was pondering a thought that has been both recent and long term. That all of the things I, you, we, talk “about”, read “about”, and write “about” occur through the lens of our own being and perhaps even having.

However, now… my mind is gone somewhere else entirely from blogging. The only reason I am still posting this is because it exemplifies what I may have taken another three paragraphs to write. My current lens – my preoccupied mind – makes it impossible for me to consider any topic at all as blog worthy right now.

So, there you have it. Honestly, I did start out with the intention of a post, and it ended in a personal experiment gone awry. We will try again another time. Even though this whole thing has gone pear-shaped I might as well post – it’s the truth. If nothing else it will get C, D, J & M off my case for a bit.

Argh.

Puppy Sounds

Apparently the puppy cam is still in full operation (a few posts down, or here if you click.) So, you’ll notice that you hear puppy sounds when you’re on the main page, even though the video is down quite a bit. If that annoys you: to bad, so sad. Although, by making a post here, out of it, I am moving it closer to off the main page. So there you go C.

Updates

Every page (except docs page – but very soon I hope) has been updated very recently. Even the About page has new information and thoughts intertwined within it. Have been reading and watching some more stuff lately so there’s new stuff on that page too. Anyways, just a general reminder that things change on the other pages without notification always appearing on this main page. Of course, the photos also change quite regularly as well, and appear on the left, or visit flickr for all of them. If you become a friend on flickr you get to see even more shots when you go to my photostream because I mark some as private, and then they don’t appear on the left (including the two most current at flickr). If you want to join, just ask and I can guide you through it easy peasy.

Take care.

Second Anniversary Stats

Yesterday marked the second anniversary of this venture. Two years ago I cobbled together a first post and we got this ball rolling. The third year of Être ou Avoir is now upon us, but we still need to close out the second and properly transition. As mentioned a couple of posts ago, I’ve been living life lately, so blogging hasn’t been the top priority – nor should it ever be. I’m sure you won’t mind that I was not as consistent in my anniversary celebrations as I was last year at this time. Still, we all like a bit of a celebration, so I’ll try to do some regular postings – as promised – and we’ll just use them to kick off the third year, rather than say good-bye to the second.

I am a bit of a geek for stats, lists, and rankings. Perhaps this is a hold-over from following sports. Some might find my interest with numbers and sound-byte facts as contrary to what appears to be a more subjective nature. I would like to think there is a place for both facts and stats, as well as formative reflection. Quite plainly, they can also be a bit of fun. Fun is allowed in balance – but more on that another time. Thus, some sumative information that I hope we drift far from in the next postings. Drifting is allowed when trying to balance.

Snapshots from the 2nd year!

-2,845 page views (5,634 all time).
-post viewed* the most often: Sia at the Media Club (Oct 30, 2007). At 99 views, this is the most viewed post all time as well. * This means viewed on its own page the most often. Other posts may actually have been read more if they are read from the main page, and not clicked on, found in searches, or linked to specifically (as was likely the case with this post).
-busiest day: Friday June 29, 2007. One year ago today, there were 108 page views as people read the One Year Thank You. (This post is probably the “most read” post then).
-most read page: Currently reading, listening & watching: 138 views all time.
-slowest day: Sunday May 11, 2008. The only day ever to have zero page views – Mothers’ Day.
-most comments by one person this year: The Necromancer, with 4.
-most comments all time: Andrea, with 8! She also has delivered the most feedback about the blog itself – calling for more exclamation marks!
-108 photos fed on the left from flickr.
-23 times this year (37 all time) people found this blog by typing “dong dong ju” into Google or some other search engine, making it the most popular way people have stumbled here. “dongdongju” was also used 13 times.
-longest search engine term used to find this blog: “2008 international bocce championship ta”
-post that generated the most “connectedness” – Autism The Musical. This post generated a comment from the filmmaker herself, people found my blog when searching for the film, it links to the film’s sight, and one commenter used the post as a lobby point. We’ll finish with this point, a subjective one.

It is still interesting to consider that this little hide away on the world wide web gets that many views. Sure enough, popular blogs get thousands of views each hour, but there is something to be said I think for a consistent level of page views for the second year in a row. The thank you for this goes to you. I am appreciative of your engagement in this conversation, and I’ll express it more as the week goes on. Perhaps we’ll also figure out this consistnency, or some of the meaning behind the other trends on this blog. Or perahps not. Either way is acceptable here.

Thanks for reading – hope to hear from you soon.

Second Anniversary Approaches

In less than a week Être ou Avoir will complete two years of existence. With the second anniversary approaching I am reminded that I have not been blogging regularly lately. This is not entirely bad. There has been a lot of life happening lately, and life is more important than a blog. That being said, writing, reading, commenting, pondering, photoging, agreeing, disagreeing; all things that come with blogging, can play a role – even a small role – in life. Taking the time to reflect, and offer up ideas to the world can be one aspect of balance in life. With that in mind I will attempt to bring a little more stability back to Être ou Avoir over the next week. I am not sure if I can promise once a day postings as I did with the first anniversary, but there will at least be more regular postings in the next little while.

I should probably revisit the whole rationale of this thing, and assess whether the venture should keep going. Looking back at the first post can help you and me with this. Yes, you’re involved in this too. Remember, this was meant to be part of a dialogue, not a monologue. Your feedback on direction, purpose, topics, layout, writing style, colour scheme, everything, is always welcome. Amount and type of feedback may also determine whether we keep going. Initially, I’d like to think we can, but a balanced assessment must begin with all options open. Thus, we will see what life has in store for us this week. If there’s a time and place for blogging let it be, if life decides there isn’t, then I am sure you won’t mind.

Hear from you soon no doubt.

Quick Update – 04 of 08

Seems like I haven’t blogged in a while. That probably has something to do with the fact that I haven’t. This post will certainly not return me to the realm of true blogging, but there were a few quick things I wanted to make sure were out in the open because in the future they deserve full on posts. Will they get full on posts in the future? That’s the hope, but I also hope you don’t hold your breath…

-While I’ve never been a huge Canuck fan, I’ve always been a ginormous T. Linden fan. It was disappointing to see his final season end the way it did – but special to see him receive such a classy send off. Vancouver fans rightly acknowledged the most influential and positive professional sports figure to ever grace their town.

-How great is it to be back coaching rugby again… simply fantastic. Really helps with the balance thing I’m trying to make happen. You may recall a post about it from a year ago, when the last season started.

-Days getting longer – YES!!

-Go Habs Go!!!

-While I thought Six Feet Under had ruined the rest of television, I hadn’t considered PBS’ Frontline. When they put amazing and quality stuff like that on the television screen you realize the impact the medium can actually have.

-Too much back and forth, controversy here, he said-he said there going in cycling to comment on any of it right now.

-Go Habs Go!

101st

With spring approaching it feels like it might be time to give the ol’ blog a bit of a new look. Over the next couple of weeks or so I’ll take a look at some different colour schemes, and perhaps even some different layouts. Your thoughts on the current layout and any changes you would like to see are welcome. You can also share feedback on things like topics covered, content in the side menus, and what should be featured in the secondary pages. I know D. is still waiting for some topics that were asked for ages ago. All I can say is that I remain committed to writing them… soon.

It is also somewhat timely to note, that with a new season about to begin, this post is the first of the next hundred postings. Inspiration From Within was the 100th, but I neglected to note its significance. Truth be told, I failed to notice until just a couple of days ago. Also, with spring about to strike I’m going to try being away from the computer for a bit and take advantage of last minute winter activities. I hope you take the time to do the same.

Sport Shorts:
-Congratulations to Wales for capturing the Grand Slam in Six Nations.
-Good work on the part of the gutsy French rider Sylvain Chavanel to capture stage six of the controversial Paris-Nice.
-Go Habs Go!

When Is The Experience?

I glanced at the cover of the National Post today and an article by Katie Rook caught my eye. The title is: Record Now, Experience Later. She speaks about the rising trend to digitally document events as they are happening, to have a record rather than fully participate and be in the event or moment. I recalled a reflection I had about my own photography experiences, more than a year ago. An excerpt from the posting is below:

Is there a point where one stops being in the moment and becomes separated into trying to have a picture of the moment – without actually experiencing it? On occasion I have felt this question begin to nag. Sometimes what my own eye is capturing, the sounds I am hearing, the smells being taken in and the feeling of the moment can only be captured and held together by me – not the camera. Thus, sometimes I put the camera away. The recollection of some moments, scenes, sights or experiences will only be found in my memory and stories, and not in any photo.

Further, there is authority in experiencing, not just documenting. If one wants to lend credence to an experience, and be able to draw meaning from it, learn from it, pass the “experience” garnered on to others, than one has spend effort and be in the experience. This effort can include not hitting the record button.

With an itchy record finger, there are times when we are not giving ourselves the opportunity to properly develop thoughts and emotions within the experience. Without the thoughts and emotions, how are we to place the experience in context?

Time magazine awarded its Person of the Year honours to You in 2006, because You are able to capture, post, share and discuss any event, anywhere in the world, in almost any medium. However, to keep You’re credibility, it might be that sometimes You have to stop recording and just be.